Here's taking the "P" from little old me
ajd1 There once was a lad called Dave. He was a tiresome knave.                    
He went on a quest and forgot his vest, because he thought he was brave.
It rained all night, he got into a fight. He did his very best,                            
But it didnt take long,he knew he was wrong. He got a bad cold in his chest.

Big Girlie There once was a girlie called Anne who had trouble with her man.
He was rigged like an ox, wouldnt fir in her box,                                
so she changed her name to Annie (with the big......)                        

Big Girlie writen by Zeebo I know a young woman named Anne, who writes like no one else can.
She does in a trice, where we would think twice,                                     
and I'm her number one fan.                                                                          

Darkcrystal There once was a girlie called Julie who's hair was rather unrully.            
She's shaved it off now and piersed her brow,so now she looks cool,truely!

Early Bird There was a girl called Ann Marie who sat upon her fella's knee.                
A smile on her face. It was the right place cos his loving filled her with glee.

Foxwhite v1.0 My good mate Phil had a huge phone bill, so he couldnt chat to his mates.
He cut down his time upon the phone line. Now on weekends he chats to his fill.

Foxwhite v1.1 Young Phil cut grass to earn some brass, fastest mower in the west.
Body bronzed, clippers in hand, muscles rippling under his vest.        

Grimsqueaker There once was a bloke called Tim who everyone thought was grim.
He was as happy as hell, cos hes hung like a bell,                                
though it looks like a third lower limb.                                                   

Johndory There once was a fellow named Mike who's wife said "Eat what you like."
"You can eat chocolate all day, but do what I say"                                             
"Work it all off on yer bike"                                                                                  

Lofty v1.0 There once was a bloke called Nick who had the biggest Dick                        
It was ten feet wide, that he couldnt hide.                                                             
But there was a permanent grin on his bride.                                                         

Lofty v1.1 A chappy called Nick felt terribly sick cos he ate lots of sweeties at night.
He chewed lots of gum, which stuck to his bum and gave his poor wife quite a fright.

Miss xite :)) There was a young girlie called Ruth who always told the truth.                    
She was honest, head strong as the day is long and was always terribly cooth.

Mr xite There once was a lad called Pete who had very smelly feet.
They ponged for a day, till he put them in hay.                        
Now they smell lovely and sweet.                                             

Mrs xite There once was a lady called Karen who's garden was terribly barren.
They got Ground Force in and celebrated with gin,                                 
So their all to hissed to rhyme ;)                                                                   

MulderFBI A chap called Malvin bought his duds from Calvin.
A very smooth fit. He was a handsome gitt,            
a body the gals thought worth havin.                        

Philbo There was a chap called Phil who thought he was terribly ill.
He used lots of potions and plenty of lotions, which cost quite a lot at the till.

Redvers My little mate Kevvie, his heart was heavy.
He really gagged for a girlie.                        
We gave him some tips on kissing rosey lips,
Cos the bird gets the worm when its early ;)

Shuflie v1.0 There once was a man named George, on sweeties he did gorge.
They said "You'll get fat". So he said "That is that".                        
"On my way to get thinner I will forge".                                             

Shuflie v1.1 There once was a fella named Judd who was always covered in mud.
Although terribly thin he had lovely skin,                                                 
cos the continual mud packs were good.                                                 

Smky There once was a girl named Marlene.                     
We know she couldnt be seen.                                   
We knew she was there with her long flowing hair.
So lovely she looked like a queen.                               

Sparkie My good mate Paul couldnt sit still at all, he giggled till he shook.                                 
Though he kept his face grim it soon broke to a grin, cos from BG it took only a look.

Tinhead A young lad called Steve put his hand in his sleeve and found it sewn up at the cuff.
His Mum said "Young lad your typing is bad and the phone bill is quite big enough".

Wart There once was a bloke called Ray, who was having a terrible day.
He sat at hiss miggy and rolled a fine ciggy. On IRC he did play.    

White skirt There once was a girl named Rowena who had the body of Athena.
Ray longed for the day he could get his wicked way.                           
What a smile on her face, should have seena.                                         

Worzel v1.0 There once was a man called Martin, who couldnt stop all his fartin.    
It wasnt fare, it blew off his hair and now he aint got a partin.                

Worzel v1.1 There once was a chap called Martin, who had terrible trouble with fartin.
He sat on the loo and had a bit poo, now he sh*ts himself startin his fartin.

Zeebo There was a chap called John who's willy was nine feet long.                                         
He used it for skipping and for gentle wife whipping. Then she used it just for a thong.

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       Comment's and suggestion's are welcome to Anne